Dear friends......
It has been known for many years that sex was good exercise, but until now nobody had made a scientific study of the caloric content of different sexual activities. Now af ter "original and proprietary" research they are proud to present the results.
REMOVING HER CLOTHES:
With her consent.................................12 Calories
Without her consent.........................2187 Calories
OPENING HER BRA:
With both hands.................................8 Calories
With one hand..................................12 Calories
With your teeth................................485 Calories
PUTTING ON A CONDOM:
With an erection..................................6 Calories
Without an erection.........................3315 Calories
POSITIONS:
Missionary........................................ .12 Calories
69 lying down................................... 78 Calories
69 standing up..................................812 Calories
Wheelbarrow.................................... 216 Calories
Doggy Style......................................326 Calories
Italian chandelier...................... .......2912 Calories
ORGASMS:
Real........................................112 Calories
Fake......................................1315 Calories
POST ORGASM:
Lying in bed hugging........................................... ...18 Calories
Getting up immediately....................................... ...36 Calories
Explaining why you got out of bed immediately.......816 Calories
GETTING A SECOND ERECTION: If you are:
20-29 years....................................36 Calories
3 0-39 years....................................80 Calories
40-49 years..................................124 Calories
50-59 years.................................1972 Calories
60-69 years.................................7916 Calories
70 and over.................................Results are still pending
DRESSING AFTERWARDS:
Calmly............................................ ... 32 Calories
In a hurry............................................. ..........98 Calories
With her father knocking at the door... .........5218 Calories
With her husband knocking at the door.......13,521 Calories
Remember, results may vary.
