end-beginning

Entah kau itu kegelapan ataukah cahaya
keduanya berbaur dalam sosok ringkihmu
kepadamu terlepas benciku
namun juga tawa yang paling tulus dariku

langkah hidupku beriringan dengan langkahmu
dan denyut nadiku berasal darimu
mungkin, kamu adalah aku...
dengan segala kemiripan kita

dan saat cahayamu sama sekali padam,
aku hampir terbuai dengan gelap yang menenangkan
dengan tetes air mata yang paling tulus di pipiku

selamat jalan papa
terima kasih untuk nafas kehidupan yang engkau berikan untukku
semoga disana engkau masih dapat mendengar senandungku untukmu
pergilah dengan tenang dan damai


26 Desember 2015
hug and kisses

when all that's left is a memory
of your hug when I was a kid
of those firm hands which held me when we were sailing together for fishing in a small boat
of your chit-chatting about my future
of how you seemed to know about everything
of your hopes about myself which is yet to be fulfilled...

the same hands which held mine 3 weeks ago
Do you know how happy I was when you said you wanna go to church together with me?
Do you know how relieved I was when you said that finally you understood what I wanted?

your clear voice when I call you to say Merry Christmas
your cheerful mood at that time gave me no signs
I never expected that it was the last time

too fast, that's all i can say
as, as usual, asking why always ends in vain
ashes to ashes, that's the way of life

Flowing with the calm sea,
hopefully now you are smiling from above