Some Jokes To Light UR day

[Thacth]

Just before the trial there was a commotion in the gallery.
The judge pounded the gravel on his table and shouted, "Order, order."
The drunkard immediately responded, "Thank you, your honor, I'll have a scotch and soda."

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Man Quits Smoking Because Of Will Power.
He Quits Drinking Because Of Will Power.
But He Quits Womanizing Because He Has The Will But No Power.





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Customer : Waiter, do you serve crabs?
Waiter : Please sit down sir, we serve everyone.


Customer : Waiter, is this a lamb chop or pork chop?
Waiter : Can't you tell the difference by taste?
Customer : No, I can't.
Waiter : Then does it really matter ?


Little Susie came running into the house after school one day,shouting,
"Daddy! Daddy! I got a 100 in school today!"
"That's great, Sweetheart," said her daddy.
"Come in to the living room and tell me about it."
"Well," began the confession, "I got 50 in spelling, 30 in math's and 20 in science."


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Customer : Waiter, there's a dead beetle in my soup.
Waiter : Yes sir, they are not very good swimmers.

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Customer : Waiter, there's a fly in my soup.
Waiter : That's all right sir, he won't drink much.


Waiter : I've stewed liver, boiled tongue and frog's leg.
Customer : Don't tell me your problems. Give the menu card.

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Customer : Waiter, there's a fly swimming in my soup.
Waiter : So what do you expect me to do, call a lifeguard?

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Customer : Waiter, what's the meaning of this fly in my tea up?
Waiter : I wouldn't know sir, I'm a waiter, not a fortune teller.


1st thief : Oh ! The police is here. Quick! Jump out of the window!
2nd thief : But this is the 13th floor.
1st thief : Hurry! this is no time for superstitions .


Man : How old is your father?
Boy : As old as me.
Man : How can that be?
Boy : He became a father only when I was born.

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Customer : Waiter, this soup tastes funny.
Waiter : Funny? But then why aren't you laughing?


Teacher : Peter, why are you late for school again?
Peter : Well, Miss, I dreamed that I was playing football and the game went into extra time.


An absent-minded man went to see a psychiatrist.
'My trouble is,' he said, 'that I keep forgetting things.'
'How long has this been going on?' asked the psychiatrist.
' How long has what been going on?' said the man.




Girl : Do you love me?
Boy : Yes Dear.
Girl : Would you die for me?
Boy : No, mine is undying love.

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Wife : Do you want dinner?
Husband : Sure, what are my choices?
Wife : Yes and no.


Customer : If I post this letter tonight, will it get to Delhi in two days time?
Post Master : Yes sir, it definitely will.
Customer : I bet you, it won't.
Post Master : Why not?
Customer : It's addressed to Mumbai.

[Thacth]

PRETTY ALIAS PARTI..GADIS LUGU...

Parti, seorang gadis desa asal Semarang yang lugu itu, hendak merantau ke Jakarta .
Sebelum berangkat ibunya mengingatkan padanya;
"Nduk ... kalau kamu ke kota dan kebetulan dapat jodoh di sana , yang harus kamu perhatikan;
Pertama: Carilah pasangan yang setia,
Kedua: Calon suami kamu harus orang yang hemat,
Ketiga: Calon kamu itu harus perjaka ting-ting."

Berangkatlah Parti ke Jakarta ...
Dan
beberapa bulan kemudian dia kembali ke desanya dengan menggandeng si
Anjir bin Kanal, pemuda asal Betawi untuk meminta doa restu untuk
menikah.

"Mbok.., saya sudah ketemu jodoh saya, dengan syarat seperti yang sampeyan inginkan," ungkap Parti.
"Waktu
itu kami berjalan-jalan keliling kota . Dia selalu saja menggandeng saya
dengan mesra, bukankah itu tanda pasangan yang setia Mbok ne?."
Si Mbok mangut-mangut. ..

"Kemudian karena kemalaman dan hujan kami mencari tempat berteduh dan menginap.
Bang
Anjir bilang, "Ti kita nginap saja di hotel, untuk menghemat biaya
bagaimana kalau kita hanya menyewa 1 kamar saja, bukankah pacar saya
orangnya hemat Mbok?," cerita parti berbunga-bunga.
Untuk kedua kali simbok mangut-mangut.

"Dan
akhirnya Mbok.., saya tahu kalau pacar saya itu masih perjaka
ting-ting." Langsung si Mbok mendelik, "Dari mana kamu tahu bahwa dia
masih perjaka ting-ting?".

Parti langsung menjawab, "Waktu saya lihat 'Niku nipun' (Anunya) masih
terbungkus karet mbok."

Sambil roboh nyunsep, Si Mbok berucap, "Duh Parti....... Iku Kondom Nduk!"

[zanbatos]

Customer : Waiter, this soup tastes funny.
Waiter : Funny? But then why aren't you laughing?

Wakakaka boleh juga nih buat ngerjain temen

[mahonk]

wkakakakak ...

loco ....

[D_JAY]

wkwkwkwkwkkw.
ok banget kk...

[capeq_maen]

da pernah baca kk sori ya

[Ngatinem]

Little Susie came running into the house after school one day,shouting,
"Daddy! Daddy! I got a 100 in school today!"
"That's great, Sweetheart," said her daddy.
"Come in to the living room and tell me about it."
"Well," began the confession, "I got 50 in spelling, 30 in math's and 20 in science."



mantappssss....

anak yg pintar....

[cyruss]

Hahaha..

Msh dipacking tuch.. lol..

[Thacth]

[capeq_maen]

^
^
^
swt gambarnya pasti TS ni

[mahonk]

gambarnya TS n fam' tuh pasti ...

[zanbatos]

Parah bener itu ... masa yg melengkapi kata "Duck" malah jadi "*uck"

[romanstics]

wkwkwkwk oi TS ati2 itu si jalu ntar kepotong wkwkwkw